The syllabus is my taskmaster,

I shall not relax.

It maketh me to stay up late writing papers,

It leadeth me to the library on weekends

It tireth my brain.

It causeth me to stress out over my professor’s grading scale for my GPA’s sake.

Yea when I walk through the shadow of midterms and finals

I find no relief, for deadlines loom over me.

Time goeth too slowly when I am in class

and too quickly once I get out of it;

My assignments never endeth.

Surely stress and procrastination shall follow me all the days of my life

And I will yawn and sleep in the classroom forever.